The following post is from Scott McClatchy, husband, father, musician, and friend to many.<\/p>\n
One of the strangest things about being a parent is that there are so many things that I never imagined that would ever concern me have now become part of my everyday life.\u00a0 Like explaining to a six-year old boy what exactly does it means to be a friend.<\/p>\n
One of the toughest hurdles to cross in this daily conversation is that not all parents believe in the same thing.\u00a0 So, as I tell my son one thing, he inevitably will respond with an example of how one of his school buddies acts the exact opposite.\u00a0 When I tell my son to try to make \u2018good choices\u2019 – like sharing your toys, he\u2019ll remind me that when he shares his toys, he will sometimes never see them again. So now the conversation takes a left turn into the idea that being a good friend also means respecting other people\u2019s property, and he will bring up examples of all the kids who don\u2019t.\u00a0 Soon the conversation has splintered into so many different ideas of what being a friend means, that it leads my son to retreat to his toy room for some well deserved play time Though, in retrospect, I should be proud of my son\u2019s courtroom presentation of his case \u2026 I just wish I knew more about the Kindergarten legal system.<\/p>\n
So I try to fall back on the Golden Rule; if you really want to be a good friend – Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.\u00a0 Sadly, scriptures don\u2019t go over well with most kids under the age of thirty-five, so I try to break it down for him.<\/p>\n
\u2018Being a good friend means that you should try to always make sure your friends are happy.\u2019\u00a0 And, to my son\u2019s credit, he usually does tell me that he often does let his buddies choose what games to play or pick what sport to attempt.\u00a0 And, happily, I have watched him do this on the playground.\u00a0 But I\u2019ll tell my son that not all kids want to play together \u2026 and that\u2019s OK!\u00a0 I\u2019ll tell him that someone who might not want to play with you today, or be your friend today \u2013 well, they might want to tomorrow, so don\u2019t ever stop asking. But, most importantly, when someone doesn\u2019t want to play with you, or be your friend, try to understand that you still are a really great kid. And, somewhere in the park or playground, there\u2019s another little boy or girl just waiting to play with you.<\/p>\n
And it\u2019s at these times when I can explain to him, and I very often get to see it happen, that \u2018being a friend\u2019 can be nothing more than walking up to another child and saying \u201cHi, want to play?\u201d<\/p>\n